I’ve been feeling low, like my writing is a waste of time. My head’s been full of stupid thoughts.
There’s no point
Why am I bothering?
I’ll just be a big failure. A laughing stock.
I’ll never get a book deal or an agent
I’ll sell no copies
I’ll get 1 star reviews
Basically I feel like giving up.
Why now? I’m on the verge of finishing a writing project. Evangeline and the Alchemist is going through line edits and is almost ready to release into the world. So why do I feel like giving up when I’m so close to completion?
Resistance doesn’t want me to change. He is a controlling bastard and he wants me to stay where I am. He wants me tucked up, cozy in my comfort zone where I am safe.
From an evolutionary perspective, Resistance makes sense. My body is trying to stop me from taking too many risks and doing anything stupidly life threatening. But come on. Really? Is publishing some writing such a big friggin’ deal?
Are you paralysed with fear? That’s a good sign. Fear is good. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember our rule of thumb: the more scared we are of a work or calling, the most sure we can be that we have to do it.”
Steven Pressfield, The War of Art
Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art is helping me through the self-doubt. (I’ve talked about this book before. Go get it now, if you haven’t read it.) It’s become the last thing I read at night, like a comforting poem or verse. Pressfield’s words remind me I’m on the right track. I’m feeling this way because this is something I need to do. And hey, even if I fall on my face, no one is going to die. I’ll pick myself up and try again.
Are you listening, Resistance?
Get out of my way.